The human body is amazing in that your brain racks up old hurts and disappointments. It essentially records offenses.
Along the road of life, you may wonder how you can forgive others for their offenses. The alternative is that you get stuck in a rut of continuing to rack them up – and collect them.
If You Collect Offenses And Are Over 40, You’ll Look Over 50!
What’s the difference between people who collect offenses and those who don’t? The difference is that you have a choice.
It’s entirely possible that if you collect offenses, you are surrounded by others who taught you how to be offended by others and have experienced quite a few of life’s heartaches.
To reverse this, you will have to reset your mind so that these hurts and disappointments will not accumulate.
There are a few ways to do this. What’s not recommended is that you just throw out all your friends – including those who are notorious for being offended by others. You won’t have any friends left!
However, it is a good idea to take a break from them until you gain the skill needed to master never getting offended. This may take about six months.
Two Ways To Stop Getting Offended
The fact is that all of us need a way to stop getting offended. Life is full of hurts and disappointments and carrying them with us on the journey in life is not a good plan.
People are attracted to those who can brush off obstacles and hurts in life and still stay on track, be friendly and sweet. On the other hand, people flee from those who are easily offended and collect hurts quicker than some people collect cookie jars.
Once you get started on using either of these ways to stop getting offended, your life is guaranteed to improve. You won’t let offenses bother you. Offenses could of course be life’s insults or insults from others.
1. Stop Getting Offended With NLP
One of the best ways to do this is to either pick up a book on neuro-linguistic programming or NLP, or hire an NLP coach to work with you for a few months.
NLP is a way at looking at what words you are saying and how they are creating your reality.
If you say that you are having a bad day, for example, you are reinforcing that the day is bad. You’re essentially calling in more bad events!
An NLP coach listens to what you say and asks you if you really mean what you say, and gives you the opportunity to change it.
By changing that bad day mentality to “I hit a little bump in the road and am getting back on track now,” you use NLP to change your life. Now your mind hears that you are an overcomer, not someone stuck in a bad place.
2. Stop Getting Offended By Seeing The Good That Resulted
Another way to stop getting offended with life is to totally change your view of what is happening.
For this, you’ll have to best start with a list of bad things that have happened to you in the past. Here’s an example:
1. Dog died
2. Car broke down on the freeway.
3. Daughter got lost at the mall.
4. Son got hurt at football practice.
5. Sprained your ankle.
6. Lost a job
This list could easily fill up 2 entire pages! What you do with this list is where the magic comes into the picture. Ask yourself what good came out of the bad thing that occurred.
Here’s what your new list may look like:
|1. Dog died||We got a new puppy who inspires us to love life just as much as she does.|
|2. Car broke down on the freeway.||Had no idea how much we needed that axle fixed and discovered the tires were wearing out before a major blowout.|
|3. Daughter got lost at the mall.||Was able to discuss how to always be able to find us when lost, and create a strategy that we didn’t have before.|
|4. Son got hurt at football practice.||Son was overworking and the injury forced him (and us) to slow down. We can pay more attention to his physical needs now.|
|5. Sprained your ankle.||Realized the shoes I was wearing really weren’t too supportive and got orthotics which will correct problems while walking. This will prevent future foot problems.|
|6. Lost a job||Hated that job anyway and now have more time to find the job I really want.|
|7. Mary said I was lazy.||I know deep in my heart I am not lazy. I can pray for Mary because people who are critical of others are really lashing out at others for their own faults. Confirm self-confidence.|
You can get to the point where you never collect offenses, stop getting offended, and every night you thank your God for another great day.